


Waiting for Forever

by shutupfour



Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Angst, Comfort, F/M, Fluff, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-04
Updated: 2015-07-04
Packaged: 2018-04-07 14:40:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,724
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4267116
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shutupfour/pseuds/shutupfour
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Some Spoilers, mostly with the Solas romance. </p>
<p>Post Corypheus/end game, something like an ending with closure for the Solas romance.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Waiting for Forever

**Author's Note:**

> It was late and I was thinking about the romance ending with Solas. I got sad so I wrote something to make me feel better. Maybe it'll make you feel better, too.

It was hard for Asteria after the events to follow the defeat of Corypheus. No one wondered why, though. All the remaining members of the inquisition knew how close the elves were. No one expected Asteria to feel better any time soon, either. They understood she needed time. For this was the reason, when they saw her slip into her chambers during the celebration, no one stopped her. Varric almost made an attempt to bring her something to drink, for he knew what Lavellan was going through, but he decided against it with a little further thought, figuring she would rather be alone. 

Asteria closed the door behind her and crumpled to the floor. She had been holding it together all evening, determined to not damper the mood of her companions. They deserved that much, after their immense effort at helping stop Corypheus. She didn’t want to ruin this for them. 

In her room, Asteria did nothing for a long time, though she couldn’t tell how long. She didn’t say anything. She didn’t shed a single tear; she merely sat on the floor, curled into herself, hair in her face, holding her stomach. It hurt. But she didn’t know what hurt, exactly. Everything hurt. Her whole body felt weighted down. 

After what felt like an eternity, the elf’s body began to tremble. All of her muscles pulsed, aching and twisting and churning. The tremors only faded when Asteria began to cry. Her sobs were accompanied by gasps of air and audible whimpers. Tears would pool in her eyes and fall, and she remained this way for a while. 

Eventually, the elf uncurled her body, and slowly stood. Her eyes were red and puffy, and accompanying her new headache was an immense feeling of empty nausea. Somehow feeling worse than before, she strode out onto the balcony of her room. 

The sun was just setting-she supposed she had been crying for an hour or so-and she wrapped her arms around herself, just as Solas would have if he were there. She closed her eyes and tried to imagine it actually was him, behind her, comforting her and telling her it was over. That she had done it. That she could take a deep breath, and know that she had come out victorious. And for a moment, she actually believed herself. _Ma vhenan_ , he would have said, _it is done_. She would have asked him what came next. _For the first time, I do not know, vhenan_. He would have given himself a pause here; Asteria loved that he was such a romantic. _But for the first time, it does not matter-simply that I am with you_ , he would have replied, and tightened his grip on her.

This made Asteria cry again, though not as hard this time. She felt her throat tighten, and let the tears well up. A single one fell and landed on her sleeve, darkening the fabric. She stood for a few more minutes, wondering where her Solas was, and why he left. She needed him more than ever now, and a part of her had hoped he would have came walking through her door, and told her that he was sorry, and that he had never meant to hurt her. And she would have wrapped her arms around his neck and told him that it was okay, and that she forgave him, and that she loved him and never wanted to lose him again. 

The elf thought for a second, and recalled she had never told him she loved him. A deep regret built inside of her, before she decided that he must have known. Solas must have known that her love for him was unspoken, that she was afraid of saying it out of fear of losing him. He was unimaginably intelligent, after all. Yet, she took little comfort in this thought. 

After the sun had sunk beyond mountains, a knock at the door was heard. Lavellan perked up, a sliver of hope beginning to shine. 

Cassandra walked in instead, slowly and cautiously, judging Asteria’s reaction. A few seconds passed before Cassandra decided she was allowed in, and Asteria was secretly glad for the company of her.  
“Are you alright?” the seeker asked.

“No,” Asteria replied, her voice quiet and small. 

“Of course not… my apologies,” she said. When no response was heard, she continued. “Solas loved you, you know. He would not have left without good reason.”

The elf felt another wave of tears begin, and she didn’t try to stop them. “I know.” 

And she did know.

“He probably did not tell you, but he spoke of you often to us. He would tell us how much he worried about you, when you would go out fighting. He mentioned on more than one occasion how he would feel better if you had stayed behind,” Cassandra waited for a reaction, but received none.

“I… I didn’t know that,” Asteria choked out after a few moments. Cassandra placed a hand on her back and moved it around slowly, as a mother would a child.

“I figured as much. Solas was very… reserved, that way. But I apologize. I speak of him as though he has passed. He is still out there, which means he is still thinking of you. I am sure of that much.”

“Thank you, Cassandra,” the elf reached over to hug the seeker, “But, I think I’m going to go to bed now-it has been … a very long day.”

“Of course. Know that you can always talk to me, if you need it.” Asteria nodded, and gave Cassandra a flimsy, but grateful, smile.

Once alone, it didn’t take very long for the elf to fall into a deep sleep. She dreamt as she slept, and found herself in the fade. After Solas had taken her there, she had found it enjoyable to walk and explore herself.

oOo

Asteria wandered, passing through different places she had been in her travels, and eventually found herself in Haven. She remembered how Solas had said Haven would always be important to her, though not for the reason he thought. Haven would always be where Asteria had met Solas, but even more than that, it was where she and Solas shared their first kiss, where Asteria had decided that Solas was the only one for her.  
Thinking she might find something here to comfort her, she walked around Haven. She saw the stable master, the apothecary, and the few families that called Haven their home. As she walked up the steps to the palace, she froze. Her heart picked up pace, and she was sure she wasn’t breathing--

Solas. 

“Ma vhenan… I am terribly sorry.” He said. His voice sounded strained. 

“Is it really you?” Asteria cried. She felt her face become hot again, and her eyes pricked with more tears. She thought she might not have had any left.

“Yes, my heart. I am so sorry.”

Asteria walked up to him, slowly. “Solas, I… don’t… you don’t have to apologize. It’s okay.”

“No, it is not. I have caused you a great deal of pain. I never meant for this to go as far as it did, and I am sorry.” He reached out for her hands, and Asteria took them without missing a beat. “I… I should not have kissed you in the fade, that first time… it was… irresponsible of me.”

“Stop…” Asteria felt a tear drop onto her cheek and slide down her face.

“Do not cry, ma vhenan. Though I am not there, I will always be with you. I promise.”

“Do you regret being with me?” she choked out.

Solas gently, yet firmly grabbed her chin with his fingers. He gave her a hard stare. “No. Do not ever think I regret us.”

They stood there, hand in hand, one crying and one close to tears, and it was strangely beautiful. The star crossed lovers, saying their goodbyes, yet not saying a single word. 

Solas moved closer, so that the length of his body was against Asteria’s, and embraced her. she leaned into him, extending her arms around his back. They stood like this for a while. They took in each other’s shape, how they molded to each other so perfectly. Solas breathed in her sweet scent, inhaling deeply and holding his breath before exhaling. Asteria smothered her face in Solas’ neck, and whispered, “Will you ever come back?” loud enough for only him to hear.

There was a long pause before Solas answered. He leaned away so that he was able to look Asteria in her ice blue eyes that had entranced him the moment he saw them. “I do not know what the future holds. But if I ever find myself in your world again, I will find you. You have my word.”

With this, Solas took off the rope that had hung around his neck. He gazed at it before speaking. “Here. To promise that I will return to you, someday.” Solas gently laid the necklace around Asteria, looking at her with loving, longing eyes. 

Asteria accepted this answer, and embraced the elf once more. 

“I love you, Solas.” She said. Her intense feelings of sorrow had left her, and had instead been replaced with a smaller sadness, but more than that, a sense of closure. She believed him when he said he would find her. And she would wait as long as the world would make her, in order to be with him again. She would wait her entire life, if that was when he would return.

“I love you, too, ma vhenan. I will always love you.”

The last thing Asteria felt before she awoke, was a gentle kiss that was placed on her forehead, from soft lips that she will always know as his. 

oOo

When Asteria awoke, she opened her eyes to see the sun’s light shining from her windows. She looked down as she got out of her bed, to find a wolf’s jaw hanging from her neck. She took it in her hands, running her fingers over every bump and ridge, feeling the smooth texture of the worn bone. Bringing it close to her heart, she smiled a delicate smile. And this time, when Asteria felt her eyes begin to wet with tears, she blinked them away.


End file.
